Remember, people aren’t always what they seem. You may think someone may not make a good friend just by looking at them, but you don’t know what that person is like until you get to know them.
You could also try a different hang out spot. If you usually hang out in the library after school, try moving to the gym or the courtyard, for instance.
You could play basketball, volleyball, or soccer. You don’t have to join a sport at your school. Your community should also have sports and other athletic activities for kids your age, including dance.
You could join a chess club, art club, marching band, or school choir. It doesn’t have to be a club or even something associated with your school. You could join community clubs or classes, too.
Start with, “Hello, I’m Jessica. What’s your name?” Bring up a topic to begin the conversation. In a conversation, both you and the person you’re talking to need a chance to say something. You’re exchanging information to learn about each other. For example, you could ask them about their favorite singer or what their favorite color is. [7] X Research source You could also start a conversation about what’s going on around you. For instance, if you’re in math class, you could say, “Is there a lot of homework this year?” If you’re at lunch, you could say, “So what’s your favorite food?”
In other words, try not to cross your arms or look angry if you want someone to approach. Try to look happy and interested in other people. If someone comes up to say “hello,” ask her to sit next to you. You could say, “I’m so glad you came over! Would you like to sit next to me?”
You could ask them, “What’s your favorite food?” If they say, “Pizza!” you could say, “Pizza is my favorite, too! We made it at home last week. " That way, you’re offering something about yourself (what your favorite food is), as well as offering them something to respond to (“We made it at home last week. “) They might say, “Really? I’ve never made pizza before. Is it hard?”
For example, you discovered you both have a love of pizza. That’s a common interest! You could get pizza together, or you could even invite them over to your house to learn how to make pizza. You could say, “Since we both love pizza so much, maybe you’d like to come over sometime and make pizza with me. "
For example, you could ask, “I saw you’re on the dance team. How long have you been dancing?” Or, you could ask, “How’s your project for our math class going? Mine is taking forever!”
All you have to do to give someone a compliment is tell them something you like about them. For instance, you could say, “Your purple shirt is awesome!” or “You’re really smart!” Of course, you don’t want to stop just because you became friends. Keep giving each other compliments. It’ll make you both happier.
For instance, bring them a treat from home when you bake, or help them out when they’re struggling with a problem. You could also make them a bracelet to show you want to be friends.
Respond to what they say. For instance, if they say, “I’m really sad,” say, “I’m sorry. Why are you sad?” In addition, it’s important to listen when your friend is going through a tough time. Everyone has problems from time to time, and it usually helps to talk about it. When your new friend is feeling down, ask them what’s wrong. See if they want to talk about it, and then listen to what they have to say. Being a good friend means being there for them when they need someone to listen. Social skills come easier to some people than others. If you want some practice, ask your parents. They can help you build your listening skills. [14] X Trustworthy Source Child Mind Institute Nonprofit organization providing evidence-based care for children with mental health and learning disorders and their families Go to source You can also use nonverbal listening cues. Look the person in the eyes, nod when they speak, and give them small affirming words (like “uh-huh”) to let them know that you’re listening. Have open body language towards the person: face them and don’t cross your arms.
For example, maybe you don’t like the fact that your friend loves Justin Bieber. Everyone has different tastes, so let it slide. Maybe you notice that your friend chews with their mouth open and that bothers you. It’s better to just overlook that fact than to unfriend a person over it.
