Ask open ended questions that delve into the person’s past and present. Find out their career ambitions, their hobbies, and what they enjoy about life. Also ask about their love lives. Sometimes inquiring about a person’s dating life is one of the things that hint towards you being interested in them as more than a friend. Friends don’t tend to ask you about your last relationship and what went wrong.
Take the time to recap an attribute that made you notice him or her by saying something like, “Your smile took my breath away. ” If you have been out with him or her before, mention a detail of an outfit you’ve seen them wear before and mention how it made you feel watching them in it: “You had that amazing sundress on that day and it had me looking at you like, wow. ”
Say their names purposefully. When you know someone, you very rarely refer to them directly by their names. In a husky voice, say their first name. It will personalize the conversation and make them think about you saying their names in other places. It will make their heart race slightly. Diffuse the tension a little by laughing and joking saying, “Don’t go getting any ideas!” It’s a way to play with the sexual tension without fueling it to a point you aren’t ready for just yet.
Before you text him or her, make sure that you have something of value to add to the conversation, whether it be a joke or a genuine compliment. Think of creative ways to initiate text messages like mentioning a lyric to a song you both like or a movie that the two of you love. Create inside jokes to build and show interest. Text an attention grabber like, “I’m thinking of you so I know you’re probably thinking of me. ”[4] X Research source It’s cocky, without being overly cocky and is bound to get its reader to crack a smile and respond in a hurried fashion.
Text him or her once, wait for a reply, and if you get one, reply with one text in response. Think of texting as a dance, you take a step, and then they take a step, you take a step, and then they take a step. If you don’t get a reply, wait a full 24 hours to attempt to reach out again. As the relationship progresses, you will be able to slowly increase the frequency of your text messages. Too much at once though feels over-eager and can read as desperation. Appearing scarce by allowing time in between texts creates intrigue.
Give him or her a cute nickname, preferably one that has something to do with a shared experience between you two, “punk”, “brat”, “dimples”, “smiley”, or “giggles”. You can call them something common like “babe”, “baby”, or “sweetie”. [6] X Research source Create some playful sexual tension by texting things like, “Stop trying to seduce me, I know what you’re up to” or “Get your mind out of the gutter!”[7] X Research source
You do not have to wait for the other person to make the first move in establishing contact. [10] X Research source Maintaining balance between exchanges is important but who acts as the initiator is not. Ladies, if you want to call a guy that gave him your number, you don’t have to wait for him to call you first. While gaps between conversations are perfectly fine, don’t allow more than a couple of days to pass without some form of contact happening.
Some light-hearted, fun questions to include on your topic list are: “Beer, wine, or liquor?”, “Favorite way to relax?”, “Superpowers you wished you had?”, and “What’s the weirdest thing about you?”[11] X Research source Prepare yourself mentally to answer any questions that you ask. Conversations typically progress that way naturally. [12] X Research source
Find a quiet location to speak to him or her, avoiding heavily populated locations like a bus, shopping center, or a movie. You want the person to be able to hear you clearly and allow your tone to feel calm and collected as you flirt with your love interest. Choose a time of day where you know the both of you will not be busy and be less prone to distraction. A good way to do this is to ask him or her ahead of time when an ideal time to call would be.
